Tuesday, August 17, 2004

when your imagination takes over your mind...

and you can't separate it from reality (or don't want to)...then you're in trouble. do you ever think up situations and start believing them to be true (like your imagination would create images--weird ass images/made you cry images)? i was doing that for the past few months. thinking the worst situation possible, and then i started to believe them to be true. but the more i go on, i find that none of it was true. i just have a problem of thinking the worst possible situation, and sometimes (well at least they used to) come true. someone told me...if you think it, it will happen. so i'm going to try to think of positive thoughts. *sends good vibes out* i mean, to some point that is possible...but in my case it takes a lot of hard work and good vibes to make anything happen. but that is my theme isn't it? my destiny = making things happen (no matter what). it's just weird how i let all those different "images" take control of what was reality. then i went and told some people about these said "images" and they encouraged me to go the other way (not deal--fly far away), after all not like there was anything really "there" *shrug* (or maybe they just wanted me to open up another door). i don't know. it's just weird how some things panned out. maybe the next time "images" start poppin in i won't go to everyone else, and just the one the "images" are about. *shrug* sometimes i don't know about what people say to me (like they have an ulterior motive)...the ones that don't know me that well that is. then again sometimes the ones that do know me sometimes say the oddest things that throw me off even more. i don't know. i'm probably just babbling. or maybe when i have questions, i should just ask...or when i have problems (instead of questioning myself or asking for advice) i'll just go straight to the source (cut off the middle man) and deal. that seems to work, well at least lately. it's just sometimes my mind can play the weirdest tricks on me, and i'll just start believing them to be true...no matter how hard i try to fight it (it still does).

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