ELEMENT: Woman

SYMBOL: WO DISCOVERER: Adam ATOMIC MASS: Accepted as 118 lbs, but known to vary from 85 to 550 lbs. PHYSICAL PROPERTIES: Surface often covered with painted film. Boils at nothing, freezes without reason. Melts if given correct treatment. Bitter if incorrectly used. Found in various stages ranging from virgin metal to common ore. Yields to pressure applied to correct points. CHEMICAL PROPERTIES: Has a great affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances. May explode spontaneously without prior warning, and for no apparent reason. Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol. The greatest money reducing agent known to man. COMMON USES: Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars. Can be a great aid to relaxation. TESTS: Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in natural state. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen. HAZARDS: Highly dangerous except in experienced hands. Illegal to possess more than one. Extremely volatile when disposing of, regardless of level of caution and care exercised. CONCLUSION: While this element is highly unpredictable in its behavior, there is no other known element in the universe to replace it. Despite the hazards listed above, it is highly sought after and irreplaceable. Without it, the element known as MAN would cease to exist in its present state. In fact, it would cease to exist altogether. got this one from mike. thanks man! it says it all in the conclusion...