mammoth madness here we all are on top of dave's run... we like to call it "dave's walk", if i wasn't so tired after getting down that mountain i would have taken an after picture. that particular mountain took some of us (yes, me included) a long ass time to get down. after you go across a way (where we took the picture) you go down (into 4 ft or more of powder--and you have to go all the way down). that i think was the toughest mountain i went on...it wasn't a double black, but they were saying it was a black. but we all were walking most of that run. everything before and after that was really cake, but WE DID IT!!! so yeah, mammoth was by far the best boarding trip i've ever been on. the powder was so nice and fluffy (i just hated getting stuck in it--i should have just sat on my board and tried to slide down). i did a better job of getting off the lifts (i hardly fell!), i went down more black diamonds, and we all had a great time (with the exception of my migrane the first day). i made some new friends, and i'm really really really glad i went. i think i'm getting better! *click* *click* so there we all were. thank you for inviting me guys & thanks rianne for cooking! i think the only damage during this trip (for me) was i broke some of my nails (and i lost a lot of sleep). i don't see any bruises, and i'm not in a lot of pain! but we'll see how i feel tomorrow....

the mother of all mountains in cali at least. yes, i'm heading down to daygo after work, and from there....mammoth mountain. i'm finally going where everyone keeps talking about. two days of fun on fluffy white powder (thanks to the storm), hopefully i'll master the art of getting off a lift (and other things). am i excited? yeah...actually i am, i'm just in the worst moods ever. everything that could go wrong last night....did. issue after issue, and on top of that it was raining like no tomorrow (well, we did need it). i was running around with no umbrella (i know, i know), getting all my crap and then some....ending up at my favorite store ever....BEST BUY. and since it was ash wednesday, i ended up not eating dinner since all i have is meat (must go to grocery store when i get back). that so didn't help my mood either. stupid usb hub screwed everything up...but not to worry, i'm back in business thanks to my computer guru (he didn't even have to come over this time--he talked me through it over the phone). if it's not one thing, it's another....i'm just happy that things are working again. but i woke up late, forgot to pack my pj's (gotta go to vicky secrets or gap sometime today), hopefully i didn't forget anything else (at least i don't think i did). man, of all days to be grumpy...

ashes to ashes, dust to dust.... happy ash wednesday everyone! already got my ashes at 6:30 in the morning (and i even woke up late-talk about getting ready quick style). i made 3 lenten sacrifices for this year (i usually try to make things in 4s but i couldn't think of another one) and i'm hoping to make it through the 40 days and 40 nights with no problem. i made big ones too this year, it's gonna be tough but i know i can do it. basically, all my sacrifices have to do with things that make me super happy (and i love being happy, sometimes over and over....). but anyway, be gone with the sweets, sugar rushes, and pleasurable times. this time around i'm REALLY sacrificing. wish me luck, and good luck to all of you who observe....

friendship's like a season, some stay for just that season... and some stay the whole entire season i got that from my girl gen, i thought it was appropriate for my mood (especially lately). i've been reminiscing about a lot of things as of late, mostly the friendships i've had thoughout the years. all the people that i've met before we left cali, and when we got back. it's just funny who i keep contact with now, and who i don't, and the reasons we lost contact. it's just weird. like for instance, my brothers best friend (howard) was my sadie hawkins date from my junior year of high school. in fact, back then i wasn't allowed to date....so in order for me to go to the dance, noel had to go. they've been friends ever since, and since then we've been tight (no matter who came or went, that connection was always tight). in fact, howards's current girlfriend is one of my good friends (at least i consider her to be)....actually, she's the one who gave me that quote. weird right? i mean we have our little circle of friends, and whenever i go home they make me feel like i've never left. it's really nice. then i have the friends that i've met through state, or through irc. let's say these are from my college years (that's what i tell my parents anway). the majority of my friends now are from this period of my life, and it's just funny that we all still keep in contact....some of them i'm closer to now than i was back then. for some time i really didn't talk to some of them, then we all get in one room and it's as if no time has passed (that's the true test of friendship, and i love them all). so slowly but surely i've been getting back in touch with everyone, and i wonder why we ever lost contact. in fact, one of my very best friends i met back in highschool...but we weren't as close then as we are now. you see, she was really cool (she was in dice) and i just wanted to hang with her...we kept in contact (and i never lost faith in her) and now we're the best of friends. she's always checking up on me to make sure i'm doing good, or if i ate (man the girl can cook!). my other best friend i met through my old best friend (i didn't lose faith in her either), we always talked to each other once a year at least (after i moved down to la)...but recently she crawled out from under her rock and i talk to her if not every day, every other day....in fact she went with me to jersey recently. we made a pact to go somewhere every year (and if i move out east she's gonna visit me--even when it's cold). i've learned that no matter where i go, how far or close...these people will always be important to me. i'm always gonna be there for them no matter what (thank goodness for free longdistance and nights starting at 7pm). and as long as you have faith, they'll be there...and i'll be there for the long haul. i'm more of a entire season kind of friend (unless you burn the bridge so badly that there is no recovery in sight). i'm really glad for the friends that are still around, and i'm even happier for those that i've gotten closer to. it makes me have a mushy feeling inside (and i actually like feeling that way). you all know who you are. i'm glad i didn't lose faith.

only in la.... saw the weirdest thing on the news this morning...butt facials. the lady getting it done says that men are into butts these days, and well ya need to take care of your "assets" anyway. it came complete with a massage, and a green tea type looking mask. it was the weirdest thing, it's like the regular facial but for your butt. anyway, just thought i'd share that with ya'll. happy monday! *mwah*

stuck in my head.... I Knew I Loved You ~ Savage Garden Maybe it's intuition, But some things you Just don't question Like in your eyes, I see my future in an instant And there it goes I think I found my best friend I know that it might sound More than a little crazy But I believe ... ~ * ~ * ~ I knew I loved you before I met you, I think I dreamed you into life. I knew I loved you before I met you, I have been waiting all my life. ~ * ~ * ~ There's just no rhyme or reason Only the sense of completion And in your eyes, I see the missing pieces I'm searching for I think I've found my way home I know that it might sound More than a little crazy But I believe ... ~ * ~ * ~ I knew I loved you before I met you, I think I dreamed you into life. I knew I loved you before I met you, I have been waiting all my life. ~ * ~ * ~ A thousand angels dance around you, I am complete now that I've found you. ~ * ~ * ~ I knew I loved you before I met you, I think I dreamed you into life. I knew I loved you before I met you, I have been waiting all my life. ~ * ~ * ~ I knew I loved you before I met you, I think I dreamed you into life. I knew I loved you before I met you, I have been waiting all my life.....

reminisce over you it's only in our twilight years when our pace is slowed and the long race is nearing the end, that we spend most of our time looking backwards...and we wonder why we were ever in such a hurry. love, heartbreak, pleasure and pain. in the end, it's all passion...use them both. some people see the forest, some people see the trees. ~everwood

girlfriends A young wife sat on a porch on a summer day, drinking tea and visiting with her mother. As they talked about marriage, and the responsibilities of life, the mother turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter. "Don't forget your girlfriends," she advised. "They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you'll have, you are still going to need girlfriends. Remember to go places and do things with them. And remember that girlfriends are not only your friends, but your sisters, your daughters, and other relatives too. You'll need other women. Women always do." "What a funny piece of advice," the young woman thought. "Haven't I just gotten married?" "Haven't I just joined the couple-world?" "Surely my husband, and the family we'll start, will fill my life." But she listened to her mother; she kept contact with her girlfriends and made more each year. As the years went by, she came to understand what her mom was talking about. As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, girlfriends are the mainstays of her life. After 50 years of living in this world, here is what I know about girlfriends: Girlfriends bring you food and wine and scrub your bathroom when you need help. Girlfriends keep your children and keep your secrets. Girlfriends give advice when you ask for it. Sometimes you take it; sometimes you don't. Girlfriends don't always tell you that you're right, but they're usually honest. Girlfriends still love you, even when they don't agree with your choices. Girlfriends laugh with you, and you don't need canned jokes to start the laughter. Girlfriends pull you out of jams. Girlfriends help you get out of bad relationships. Girlfriends help you look for a new apartment, help you pack, and help you move or move you in with them. Girlfriends will give a party for your son or daughter when they get married or have a baby, in whichever order that comes. Girlfriends are there for you, in an instant, and when the hard times come. Girlfriends will drive through blizzards, rainstorms, hail, heat, and gloom of night to get to you when your hour of need is desperate. Girlfriends listen when you lose a job or a friend. Girlfriends listen when your children break your heart. Girlfriends listen when your parents' minds and bodies fail. Girlfriends cry with you when someone you loved dies. Girlfriends support you when the men in your life let you down. Girlfriends help you pick up the pieces when men pack up and go. Girlfriends rejoice at what makes you happy, and are ready to go out and kill what makes you unhappy. Times passes. Life happens. Distance separates. Children grow up. Marriages fail. Love waxes and wanes. Hearts break. Careers end. Jobs come and go. Parents die. Colleagues forget favors. Men don't call when they say they will. But girlfriends are there, no matter how much time & how many miles are between you. A girlfriend is never farther away than needing her can reach. When you have to walk that lonesome valley, and you have to walk it for yourself, your girlfriends will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end. Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you. Or come in and carry you out. My daughter, sister, sisters-in-law, mother-in-law,daughter-in-law, nieces, cousins, extended family, and friends bless my life. The world wouldn't be the same without them, and neither would I. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead, nor did we know how much we would need each other. Every day, we need each other still. Pass this on to the women who help make your life work. I just did. i might not have that much girlfriends (you know who you are), but i love each and every one of you. you know i'm always there for you, no matter how close, or how far i may be. *mwah*

something to keep in mind I think that what happens as you get older is that you start to live more for others than you do for yourself. To see someone that you care about smile and appreciate you, to help someone through difficult times, to really live for others, and in turn, this becomes your life, to make the lives of those you care about better, doing whatever it takes. Whether that be working the night shift until your hands become bleeding and calloused, putting aside everything, to just hear what was said to be heard, it's being who you are. Sincerity, being genuine in your motives, it's not enough to simply believe in your self, believe in your friends, your family, the people in your lives, something greater than yourself; and live for them, and they'll live with you. And that's most important, to live with people that believe in you, and people you can believe in too. ~Revelations 21 : 3 - 6~ stolen from bumblebootie. thanks girl! =)

it's my two year anniversary.... with TSMP! this is the longest job i've had....EVER! now the question is....will i make it to next year? will i make it to the next christmas party? hmmmmm....what will happen next? at least i got a raise.

jersey round 2 so we're back from our trip to the east. we had the best time, it was just really busy (and cold). this time around i brought lani so i wouldn't be the only cold one, and i wanted her to meet everyone over there. we walked all over the place & we hit up rockefeller & central park.... but i didn't go iceskating since a) the line was long and b) no one wanted to skate with me. we went to times square, 5th ave, passed st. patricks, went shopping at h&m (and all those shops on our way to central park & rockefeller), hopkee and i don't remember what the name of that bar was. oh and we made it to the met (i've always wanted to go there) that was an all day adventure (too bad we lost our map holder--he needed to carry a big sign or something). i still don't understand why you can't use your cell inside. but thanks for holding my bag phil, i didn't realize how much stuff i had inside...it was really hurting my back! i just wanted to say thanks to phil for losing sleep to pick us up, and showing us around (we really did have the best time--just was surprised how cold it really was) also, thanks to tim for helping phil shows us around. and thanks guys for showing us how to "commit". i think i'm gonna use that from now on. * click* *click* so there's the pics, we had the best time. now all i have to do is test out spring and summer, then plan 2 comes in effect. so i'm pretty tired, i just wanted to post this up and thank phil again, you are the best tour guide. i mean, walking all that way in the cold, while smoking....that IS an accomplishment. heheh thanks sweetie. okay bed time! night night all. *mwah*

one more day... the excitement is building, and we both wanna go already. they're installing my washing machine, gotta do my nails, gotta finish shopping, gotta finish packing. i can't wait to get my ass on a plane! whooooo ha! jersey here we come!!! 1/30

happy real birthday mommy!! i just wanted to wish my mommy a happy "real" birthday (her "hospital" or "birth certificate" birthday is on valentines day). and also a happy birthday to my big brother alfrancis. even though i know you won't ever see this, i'll see you one of these days.... 4/30

one of my favorite things... or actually places to eat. but unlike the little shack type deal they used to have (with just the tables outside to sit at), this one is way updated! it's the fanciest albertos i've ever been to, with a playground and everything. it's like mcdonalds!! it's even nice on the inside, complete with video games area and televisions (all on the spanish channels of course). but it was way cool! oh yeah, their still is the tables on the outside. you see... they only have these in like oc & daygo (this one happened to be in the oc area). arnie aka sk00by was kind enough to take me here before we headed down to daygo for mary's birthday party. they have the best carne asada chipys! i think i just like their guacamole, but man it was good! ya'll want good mexican? go there! daygo was fun, but i didn't bring my cam in so not a lot of pics (and i have to wait till arnie sends me copies to post them up). but all i gotta say is the wine was so nasty that i was chasing it down with water! bleu!! sangria was good, and i'm glad mary had a great time. good times again with the daygo heads, looking forward to mammoth (hopefully i can get it off)!! **edit:: here's a few more pics! 5/30

seven days.....

OLD PEOPLE SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO DRIVE!!! so i was driving in to work, minding my own business...then this old man tries to get into my lane WHILE I WAS STILL IN IT!!! i didn't even have a chance to do anything (since he was right next to me), i didn't even have a chance to see his signal light!!! so i honk right, he still continues to get into my lane while i'm still honking!!! i literally had to stop and wait till the f*cker moved over. HE ALMOST HIT ME!!! i mean really, if someone is honking at you wouldn't you stop trying to do what you were doing and WAIT till it's clear to change lanes? oh no, the f*cker just kept on going his merry way, as if he was in the right. sh*t, if i didn't notice he wasn't going straight anymore and crossing my line then he WOULD have hit me! i swear, that's just the perfect way to start my day.... 8/30

neverending circles "it's amazing how far we'll go just to maintain some measure of control. the world spins a circle within a circle, and we grip so tight, it makes our knuckles white...when all we really wanna do is let go, lose control, fall, see where we land." -from everwood monday night 12/30